Why Traditional Sex Roles Benefit Women

I am what many call a “sexist”, and the misogynist label has been sent my way a few times before. The sexism accusations usually come when I say something anti-feminist or acknowledge an unpleasant reality (in RL they also sometimes come when I make an off-colour joke).

But I do not hate women, rather I have a generally benevolent, if cynical, attitude towards them, just as I do to society as a whole. While I don’t particularly care about most women (or most men for that matter), I do generally like to see people get the best in life rather than the worst (other than the occasional bout of schaedenfreude or natural justice for the deserving).

And that is why I’m a sexist, because I wish women the best and they have been conned. The forces of disorder have have so manipulated the dominant narrative that many women (and men) now engage in fundamentally self-destructive behaviour.

So, for the purposes of helping women, I am going to clearly lay out the long con that has been played against you by society, the forces of disorder, ideologues, and the well-meaning but unknowing. This post is going to tie a lot of what I’ve written previously together, so links will be many.


Dear woman, you are taught to be independent, to avoid “ruining your life” with early marriage or having children young, to go to university and have your own career, and to avoid home-making. You are taught to be economically self-sufficient, to not be “controlled by your man”

In other words, you are taught to make your own life miserable. The jackals are trying to destroy your happiness, your sense of belonging, and your future family so they can economically exploit you. This may seem outrageous to you, but before being outraged, please finish reading, and consider the information I present. I don’t expect to change your mind now, but if I plant a seed of an idea, maybe you will germinate before you wind up miserable, exploited, alone, and beyond the point of no return.

Before I begin, know this: women nowadays are profoundly unhappy. Their unhappiness has been steadily declining for the last 4 decades. A quarter of all women use some sort mental health medication, and a quarter of women age 45 or older uses antidepressants. Women use antidepressents 2.5 times more than men and antidepressant use is rising rapidly. Nearly a quarter of women will get a depressive illness in their lifetime.

Women, particularly older women, are literally drugging themselves to escape the horrors of their life.

If you’re young, the choices you make now will determine if you’re part of that 1 in 4 women who needs drugs in middle age simply to get through the day.

So listen to me, and it may help you may avoid this.


Now, like most women, you probably want to get married and have children, if not right now, then at some point in the future. I know there are a few outlier women who never want to get married and never want to have children. If you are one of those women, ignore this, none of this will matter to you at all. But if you’re not one of these women, here is a warning for you. This is the trap that has been set for you all your life.

We will start with university. University, at least the liberal arts program you are probably considering, has turned into little more than a resource extracting scam. If you go to college, there is a one-third chance you will drop out with nothing to show for it. If you do graduate you will owe $23k in debt or so (on average), which may not seem like much, but if you are in the one-half of college graduates who are under- or unemployed (ie. you won’t be using your degree), it will hurt. One-half of young people have a job (or no job) that doesn’t require their degree. Choose your degree wisely; avoid liberal arts programs.

As for going to college to become a better person, there is a high chance you will learn almost nothing.

College is a trap to suck money from you. There is only a 1 in 3 chance you will get a degree and a job that requires your degree. You will be stuck with thousands of dollars of student debt either way.

If you find a job, you will be unhappy, maybe not now but eventually. 70% of people are disengaged from their jobs, 40% of people actively dislike their jobs. 67% of mothers wish they didn’t have to work full-time; among married mothers this increases to 77%. The profile of an unhappy worker is a single, 42-year-old professional woman.

Anecdotal accounts of women leaving the workplace to spend time with your children, or wishing they could and being unable to, are legion. 43% of women leave their jobs when they have children. Leaving your child at child care is often painful for many women. Feeling guilty or missing your children while at work is common (don’t worry you’ll adjust, it won’t always be that bad). 2/3’s of parents regret spending too much time at work instead of with their children. Most working women have difficulties with work-life balance.

To many women working is a hindrance to happiness and family life, but surely the extra money is good for the children?

But there is little extra money.

Taxes will take a good 30% of your income. If you’re married, daycare will take about 10% of your household income, which means it will take up about 20% of what you earn (assuming you and your husband earn the same; if he earns more, it will take up a larger share of your earnings). If you’re a single mother it will take up 30-40% of your income.

So half of what you will earn is accounted before you even earn it.

If you’re like most people (which you are), you’ll spend part of that income on a larger home. In fact, 30% of your “extra” income will go to a bigger house (which you’ll barely see, working full-time).

So, for busting your hump, about 20% (probably less) of what you earn will actually go to disposable income or improving your quality of life. That’s not the extra expenses of working: transportation, work clothes, lunches, coffee, etc. That $20 you earn will is more like $4 in the end.

But maybe missing your children and having only $4/hour in disposable income will be worth it because you will be doing exciting things at work?

Don’t count on it. Here’s a chart of the most common jobs women work:

All these jobs, with the exception of accountants and, possibly, managers (depending on what type of manager), can be divided into 6 categories: secretarial, food services, retail, nursing/personal care, housekeeping, and child-raising.

What do you notice about these six categories? With the exception of retail work, they are all things a housewife would be doing anyway.

So, instead of taking care of your family’s schedule, you will take care of your boss’s. Instead of feeding your family, you will feed other families. Instead of caring for your children and your parents, you’ll care of other people’s parents and children. Instead of cleaning your own house, you’ll clean someone else’s. Instead of raising your own child, you’ll raise someone else’s. Or you may be working in retail, which everyone hates.

It is highly likely that at your job you will be doing exactly what you would have done staying home, except you’ll be serving strangers rather than the husband and children you love.

So, in all likelihood you will be working a job you don’t care about or even actively hate, wishing you could work less. You will be missing your children as they are raised by other people so that you can care for other people’s families, all so that you can make a couple bucks an hour in disposable income to spend on consumerist crap and pills to make the depression go away. In addition, you will go into large amounts of debt for this privilege.

Does that sound like a good deal to you, dear woman?

Does that sound like the good life to you?


It probably doesn’t. So, what can you do about it?

First, you have to get a husband. If you do not have a husband you will be forced to work that miserable job or starve (or go on welfare). Remember above, single mothers spend 30-40% of their income on child care. Add on 30% of your income for housing and 30% for taxes, and you will have only 10% of income left for everything else (although, your tax burden will likely be lower than average and government handouts will stretch that 10% a bit further). Even so, you will not have the option to avoid working like a dog at a job you hate.

You’re best chance to get a husband is now. The younger you are, the larger your pool of men to choose from and the more willing they will be to sacrifice to get and keep you. Read this post from OKCupid and truly understand that graph. After age 26 your choices in the marriage pool will start to decline rapidly. The longer you wait, the more likely you are to be stuck with an undesirable man and the less likely you will be to find a man who wants you to stay home with your children.

Marry young.

Second, if you want children you have to be able to have children. Study this graph carefully:

If you wait until your 30s you have about a 1/10 chance of being infertile and it rises rapidly after that. I will repeat: if you do not start having children in your 20s there is a 8-15% chance you will never have children. If you wait until your 40s to have children you are as likely to be infertile as you are to conceive.

If you want children, especially if you want more than one, and you don’t want to run the risk of never having children, make sure to start in your 20s. This means marrying in your early-mid 20s.

Marry young.

(As alternative to marrying young, you could sleep around and party, but there’s a strong chance you’ll regret it anyways and there’s always the chance you’ll wait too long and end up miserable and lonely.)

Third is keeping your husband. If you lose your husband, you will lose your chance to stay at home, you will be forced into working, not to mention the unhappiness, poverty, and damage to children that usually accompanies divorce. I have previously analyzed which factors in a woman lead to divorce. I will share them here as things to avoid.

To keep a husband: don’t have sexual partners before marriage, wait until your 20s to marry (but after age 20 the effects of age are minimal), don’t get pregnant until you and your partner are married, get a degree (although, this is probably just a proxy for being intelligent and diligent enough to get a degree), be devout if you are religious, and make less than your future husband.

So, if you want to raise a family and avoid the trap of working a job you dislike, while serving other peoples families and missing your own family, all for almost no actual benefit, marry young, marry a man who wants traditional sex roles, don’t have premarital sex, and go to church.

Make the right choices now, so you don’t have to pop Zoloft throughout your later years out of regret for making the wrong choices.

You, along with many other men and women, have been swindled. Don’t let yourself be swindled further. Don’t engage in feminist self-annihilation.

If the information and advice I have presented here have caused you to consider marrying early, I have a little bit of advice here on how to find and/or make a good husband.


This one’s been sitting half done for months now. In celebration of Traditional Sex Roles Week, I’ve decided to finish it. Women, it’s in your own interest to get #BackToTheKitchen.

18 responses to “Why Traditional Sex Roles Benefit Women

  • Warrior_Savant

    Couldn’t agree with you more Northerner. Alas, I think we’re fighting the long defeat until something serious gives here.

    “For the first time, American women have passed men in gaining advanced college degrees as well as bachelor’s degrees, part of a trend that is helping redefine who goes off to work and who stays home with the kids.”

    I see the decay of Western Civ in these terms, which this article obviously lauds; hordes of uselessly educated women, in jobs they’ll soon grow to resent, in fields of profession easily downsized/eliminated during economic turmoil.

    End result: women artificially move up the economic & professional chain, better qualified albeit “less diverse” men simply check out. Thus, a systematic breakdown of the 2-parent nuclear family, a spike in female independence/misery, a spike in out of wedlock births (more so than now) and a culture completely loses its identity. We’re all orphans at that stage.

    The bright side? Those self-reliant and truly productive will demand that much more of a premium when the socially irresponsibles who worshipped the false idols of higher education get dealt a heap of reality beyond the ivy covered walls.

    I’ve been on both sides of the university gate and see each side for what they are and are not. Ladies, you should hit that wall now before it’s too late.

  • FullyAwake

    Years ago, in my blue pill days, I used to think women were the more nurturing and moral of the sexes. For me, it was an easy lie to fall for. Why? Biological reaction was my biggest enemy. Also, I was programmed to believe the lie. Thanks to social programming/engineering, my ego and self-esteem demanded that I believe the lie. Having a woman in my life falsely inflated my ego and self-esteem. Most things in the media (TV, movies, books, music) are about relationships and push highly damaging, false narratives. For men, if you don’t fit a certain mold (money, height, strength, career, education), then you’re not a man. Screw that. I have all those things and I’m not putting them at risk for anyone. The fact that women just look kind of helpless did me in as well. As I’m bigger and stronger than most women, it just seemed fair (thanks to the programming) that I come to their aid when asked. Their voices also fooled me. They sound kind of innocent and sweet. There’s the crocodile tear thing as well. That one brought me to my knees every time. Because of these things, my instinct to white knight and rescue was strong. It took me a long time to figure out the manipulation/usury part. Through experience and proper education (google is my friend), my chivalrous nature has been thoroughly purged.

    The truth is that, when you give women power and money, they become worse than the worst of bad men. These days, women are nothing more than a bunch of narcissistic sociopaths, manipulating men to the extent possible. The only reason some women stay faithful anymore is because, with limited options, one must stay faithful. A women with options will most likely engage in hypergamy when the benefits of doing so are substantial, which is why women have no problem leaving a decent man for a BBD.

    For me, MGTOW is the way to go. It wasn’t an easy path to take at first. I’d grown very used to having a woman in my life. Not having one around all the time left me feeling like something was missing (I was resisting my programming). Nevertheless, after having been on my own for several years, I can’t imagine having a women living with me ever again. My life is just too easy this way. I’ve grown very used to being on my own and hope I can remain this way. Not having to worry about someone pulling the proverbial rug out from under me gives my life a lot of stability as well.

    Some have told me that I’ll grow old and die alone if I continue on this path. I don’t tell anyone this, but I’d much rather die alone than go through the garbage that I’ve been though in relationships ever, ever again. Dying alone is way underrated. If I could trade in every “committed” relationship I’ve had for the chance to die alone, I’d gladly do it in a heartbeat. For me, dying alone is a lot better option than dying with someone who’s only there to collect on my death benefits. The remains of my estate and life insurance will go to worthy charities.

    I know much of what I’ve written could easily be rewritten from a woman’s perspective. I have no problem with that. The fact of the matter is that relationships, love, “til death” and all that other BS social programming really damages most at some point. Since there’s a lot of money in deceiving people, don’t expect most to spell out that reality for you. I think one of the original purposes of feminism (not gender/rad fem) was to wake people up from damaging, false social narratives. But make no mistake – most of today’s feminism is about female superiority, male denigration and rewriting history through falsely blaming the patriarchy for everything. Gynocentrism.com clears up most of the wrong in modern feminism. If you haven’t read it yet, I highly recommend it.

  • Men are logical and women are emotional | Reflections on Christianity and the manosphere

    […] Side note: Free Northerner has a good post today about why women benefit from traditional sex roles. […]

  • Gabriel King (@Gabriel_King182)

    Very timely post. Women need to wake up and unplug from the feminist matrix. I can only hope enough of them will in time. Otherwise, many more MGTOW’s will leave them behind.

  • Alex

    I really love this. Some people (women) look at me like I have two heads when I tell them I am actually NOT going back to work after having my babies. God forbid I stay at home and raise my toddler instead of going back to my job as a SECRETARY. In fact, “Are you going back to work?” Is the question asked most by women.
    I love to learn (on my own, I have always been terrible in school) so who is to say I am not better off staying at home and working to develop talents that are useful in the home? I’m a good cook but I want to be fantastic. I can learn and enhance skills in baking, sewing, financial planning, cleaning, gardening etc. What’s more, I can work on my other hobbies like singing, piano, and drawing, when my children are a little older.
    I am living the DREAM and I can’t imagine being happier. I thoroughly enjoy spending my days caring for my husband and baby. And I have actually had rabid feminist women say I am STUPID for choosing this life. Seriously?

  • Carl

    Small typo. On the seventh paragraph I think you mean that happiness has been declining and not unhappiness as originally stated.

  • If not churchianity then… | Dark Brightness

    […] Dear woman, you are taught to be independent, to avoid “ruining your life” with early marriage or having children young, to go to university and have your own career, and to avoid home-making. You are taught to be economically self-sufficient, to not be “controlled by your man” […]

  • Ashley

    There is some good information and food for thought in this. I agree about college being a money sucking trap. Also, the fact that people are on too many medications and most of them are probably unnecessary. Fertility is an issue women need to think about, although that graph shows better results than I had suspected.

    I used to take posts like these to heart and feel offended, but I have realized that it doesn’t apply to me. I know I do not want to have kids right now or any time soon. It’s always been a, “Well maybe someday I’ll change my mind.” It’s probably not going to since this is how I have always felt and if I don’t want kids by now, I doubt I will ever. In theory it’s nice, but in reality, I know what would result. But you know, if in the case I hit 40 and can’t have kids on my own. I will adopt if I want a family bad enough. I’d be fine with that. A lot of women are happy with children and being someone’s awesome wife. That’s great for them. Then, many aren’t so happy. It’s one of those things that I think women could stand to think a little more more cautiously about.

    This post made me realize how lucky I am. I’m debt free, working a job I enjoy (that is not on that list), and I am not on any medications. I always try to keep myself in check as to what I really want in life aside from all the shoulda, coulda, and wouldas out there in the world. So far, so good.

  • Chad

    Great post. I don’t have nearly the patience or diligence to round as many studies and articles together into something that is readable and stays on point. I’m glad there are other men out there that do.

  • lauratheringmistress

    Great post. I’ll make my tiny point for the value of the true liberal arts, but you can’t actually study those in all but a few colleges now anyway. Better to just read the Great Books, preferably in their original languages.

    There is still depression if you do everything “right”. But it is the kind that comes from trying to do it while fighting against the tide of a poisonous culture that tells you “you’re wasting your life”. But for all the depression, the quality of sleep at night is far better.

  • mk

    I absolutely love this post. Couldn’t have said it better, great job.

  • FullyAwake

    Google the below:

    hypocrisy of feminism

    So much to be learned…so little time.

  • FullyAwake

    Hypocrisy is one of the many roots of all that is evil. Evil requires many a strong root to succeed.


  • FullyAwake

    This is why I loathe feminists. They’re an evil bunch, are they not? So very, very hypocritical.

    Bernard Madoff and Modern feminism go hand in hand. They’re two sides of the same coin.

    A good con is all about showing the mark what you want them to see and telling the mark exactly what they want to hear. It’s all about gaining trust and playing upon the weaknesses of men (i.e., male naivete).

    Good cop/Bad cop feminism is what we have today. There’s the good cop feminists that want to quietly and unjustly steal from men, and there’s the bad cop feminists that want to outright destroy men. Ladies – which are you? The good cop or bad cop feminist?


  • FullyAwake

    An inconvenient truth:


    I, myself, was “raped” by two women in my early teens (14). I was tall and fully developed sexually. I did not think to report that I was raped because, quite honestly, I was too busy thinking about how lucky I was to have had sex with these fantastic, mature women.

    Today, if I ever see or hear of a women having sex with a minor, I will with great haste and moral outrage, report that hag with the hope that she serve time and be listed on the sex offender listing for her entire lifetime.

    This is what feminism has taught me. It has taught me to hate.

  • FullyAwake

    Traditional sex roles are a joke today. Google the below:

    teens selfies tumblr

    What will you find through the above search? Nothing that has anything to do with what might seem to be good. The true meaning of the hypocrisy in feminism is all that you’ll find.

  • FullyAwake

    The next president of the United States? Hilary Clinton. Why is this perfect timing? It’s because Hilary represents the Hippocratic Oath of feminism. What is the Hippocratic Oath of feminism? Hypocrisy.


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